Wishing you a Soulful and Loving 2012

3. January 2012 by admin.

 Psychic Readings by Kathleen

Many of you who read my ezine ask that I tell more stories about the questions people ask and the accompanying readings that reveal futures unfolding as predicted.  It’s a complicated task due to my rather anal adherence to confidentiality.  Even not identifying the who and only the narrative itself makes me squeamish.

What I can confidently say is that the most common conundrum facing both men and women who come to me for readings is in the realm of love and at the top of the love list, not surprisingly is lover.  Other love questions such as those involving children, parents, siblings and friends are also queried but hands down, it’s the anguish of lovers that tops the list.  Taking into account my particularly skewed perspective, in part due to the type of work I do, I would have to say monogamy has gone the way of the dinosaurs.  I’m always confounded by how many people are unfamiliar with the word’s meaning.  It means having sex with only one person just in case you are one.  Curiously it still has value in most people’s heart.  Tremendous value actually.  Yet so few address it openly.  Asking a perspective partner if they are having sex with only you would seem to be too embarrassing a subject to raise.  Having been sexually active and single throughout most of the VD, herpes and AIDS era, I was indoctrinated to ask that vital question to all my partners.  As a matter of fact I asked to see his VD and AIDS test results and I’ll be happy to show him mine. if a man said he had never been tested and he wasn’t a virgin either, he was immediately relegated to the “pal” division.  In my mind he was one crazy dude and definitely not one to share more than a howdy with.  My husband plopped his medical report on the table at our second date without even having to be asked.  I was instantly star struck over his honesty and lack of denial. My heart thumped with greater certainty that this was the man of my dreams.

If you’re worried that the question of monogamy will be taken as a wheedling for commitment, you are certainly at liberty to include a caveat that you are not asking for his hand in marriage but rather for his state of health. I never met a man in my life who was so desirable he was worth dying of AIDS or VD for.  Not one.  And if you believe that simply because you are having an affair with a married man, he’s only sleeping with you and his wife, or even worse not with his wife either, please return to entry and check your ego at the door.  That notion definitely falls under the heading, Denial.  Sadly I’ve never met a man who asked me how many sex partners I’ve had.  No man wants to brave that door.  That means no man I’ve slept with has a clue how many men I’ve slept with.  That’s enough to give the bravest of us pause.

Other more complex issues arise as the relationship progresses from dates to relationship.  Loving someone fiercely who doesn’t return our affections and adjusting/adapting/accepting is one I hear most often at this stage of development.  It’s so annoying that we cannot, no matter what we do make another love or desire us.  Although when you consider the horror of someone else possessing the ability to make you love or desire them, you feel almost grateful at this state of affairs even in the throes of the worst frustration imaginable.

Finding the one is especially complicated for us humans. We all possess a heck of lot more criteria than we realize at first blush.  I often hear people extolling (men and women) the virtues of gentleness, consideration, respect and reasonable attractiveness.  So financial stability is irrelevant I ask rather tongue in cheek?  Oh absolutely they gush.  So an unemployed, homeless person who is beautiful and considerate is fine? Hell no.  I just want an ordinary human, gainfully employed, right age (no more variance than 5 years), shared cultural/religious/nationality affiliations and wants to get married.  And is my soul mate of course.  Really?  Why would you imagine your true spiritual soul mate would embody any of those qualities?  In fact since spirit’s job is to teach us something, wouldn’t it be far more likely that our soul mate would be absolutely and completely different from ourselves? No doubt why few of us actually do marry our soul mates.

I also point out to most of my clients that finding the perfect mate is a very serious undertaking.  You wouldn’t invest in a home you’ve just clapped eyes on.  A mate!  That is a far more serious investment.  You are going to share everything in your life with this person.  Your family, your body, your money, your friends, your dreams and in fact your whole future.  Perhaps even children!  Do you know how hard it is for a male alligator (or any males in the animal kingdom for that matter) to convince a female to mate with him?  For some it involves some rather terrifying and death defying stunts to prove himself worthy of joining the gene pool.  And it’s incumbent upon the females of the species to make sure the test really is tough.  That’s a lot of responsibility.  The survival of the species depends upon that discriminatory dance.  And if you think you’re going to get hot in time with someone who just fits in every other way, get out of your imagination and into reality.  Our sexual attraction is there or not.  We are turned on or NOT.  Our ideal mate is not a matter of all heart, or all head, or all body. He’s going to be the whole package.  And yes you are going to feel terrified, vulnerable, needy, sick - probably suicidal half the time but you are going to feel ALIVE.  You’ll know you are with the right one.  Because every part of you that makes you human knows this is the right one for you.  Now he has to feel exactly the same way.  That’s the complicated part.

Fortunately we don’t all have the same focus for our affections.  One woman’s ambrosia is another woman’s poison.  The most important thing is to know what you want.  What are your non-negotiables?  What darkness in him are you prepared to embrace?  Because trust me that will be the greatest challenge of your life.  His good points are a breeze but know that everyone of us is 50/50.  You know that generosity you love so much?  Well that can manifest in really annoying behaviours like buying his friends - friends you can’t stand for example.  You know how he always looks gorgeous when you go out together and every woman in the room drools with envy?  Well that can turn into the most severe critic when you’re having a bad hair day.  Know your non-negotiables and be prepared to love him even when you hate him.

If you’re an online shopper for a soulmate, be ready to kiss many, many, many frogs before you meet your prince and have skin like kevlar.  It’s a great exercise however, in sampling what your mate priorities truly are and are not.

I believe there is nothing in our lives more important than finding our special mate.  Sharing your lives with another person who is your most favourite person in the world is a wonder, joy and pleasure like no other.  But don’t for a second imagine that this is going to be easy, pleasant, or even fun most the time.  Anything worth having is going to be a lot of hard work, tears, self discipline, and gritty determination.  You will have to stare down your inner monsters (insecurity, fears of abandonment and rejection), resist urges to grab at an imaginary control you don’t have, and be yourself no matter what temptation grips you in the face of a high, potential loss.

I wish all of you a love filled 2012.  May this be the year you brave the challenge of finding that special someone to love with your whole heart and who sings your soul’s song at full throttle.

Blessings Kathleen

 Tarot Reading DVD’s

 My DVD set of my Introduction and Intermediate Tarot Workshops is available for purchase.  If you would like to order the Introductory, Intermediate or the set click here.  This is not a mass produced product - as the orders come in we burn the DVD and get it in the mail as soon as possible.

Quote:
“People who come to me to read their cards often mistake me for a magician.  They think or hope that I can cast a spell and make recalcitrant men fall madly in love with them, make ex-wives vanish into ether, and produce engagement rings from thin air.  I can’t do this.  What I can do is hold up a mirror and show them how they look to the outside world, that they are worthy of love but also in denial.  I call a spade a spade. If they are deluding themselves, I gently tell them so.  Do my clients hear me?  Yes, but it takes time to sink in.  Often they walk away annoyed or tell me I do not understand the situation. Then six months or a year down the road comes the contrite phone call confirming what I said as true.”

Confessions of a Tarot Reader by Jane Stern 2011

Please feel welcome to forward this blog site to anyone who is interested in my work.
Blessings Kathleen

519-513-9457 in downtown Kitchener

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